The two G’s – growth and grace.
Have you ever felt as if you needed to write something out but had no idea what it is that you needed to write about? One sentence down and I already feel as if I am blabbing.
Since being back from Burkina our lives have been hectic, exciting, challenging, emotional, joyful and well basically everything it could be. I can’t really describe it any other way other than maybe – growing. I feel as if the Lord has stretched me to my limits leading to so much growth. As I am typing this out I’m thinking “and here it is, THIS is why God is calling me to write. THIS is what it is”.
Growth.
Somehow as we grow older we forget about growing pains. The effects of ourselves being stretched out to reach new limits, to obtain new heights that help us grasp higher and better views and that eventually lead us to better understanding through development. God has made us so complex that we never finish learning and growing. Each day leads to new levels of ourselves and our relationship with the Lord and others. I believe it’s important to remind ourselves of this and give ourselves (and others) grace. Often times we aren’t even aware that we are in a growing stage of life – and that’s ok. I am thankful that the Lord’s grace is sufficient for us.
The more I choose to walk in wisdom and say “yes” to the opportunities that has been given to me the more I learn about my strength and weaknesses. I remember being in Egypt a few years back, crying out to God as I tried my very best to lead a very great yet strong team – thinking that I wasn’t enough. I was struggling to find a way to lead that reflected the way I have been lead in the past, from experiences and also finding my own rhythm as a leader and wife of one of our students at the time.
Guys – it. was. so. hard.
I have no idea how many tears I shed during that season but I do know that it was a lot. You know what my strongest memory of Egypt is? It’s just looking towards God, feeling Him smile down at me and say “it’s ok Sara, you know what kind of leader you want to be, you just don’t know how to get there yet”. Even in all of those challenges, I had no doubt that I was to be co-leading this team. The Lord provided everything I needed and what I needed most of all was grace and love.
I knew from the beginning that it was a time of growth for me and I knew I was called to be a leader. This does not mean that I am perfect nor does it mean that I am without fault. It just means that I am in a journey of learning about the gifts God has given me and to share them with others in different stages of life. I believe that we are all called to lead in some way but to properly lead – we must intentionally follow Jesus.
Oh Lord – how many times have I failed you? How many times have I forgotten to intentionally follow you throughout my day to better equip me for what you have set out before me? Jesus, thank You for your unending grace.
** side note **
It had been a few weeks that I have felt the Lord calling me to write a blog. When I sat down, I had no idea what I was in for. I had no ideas on what to write, I was at a complete blank but I knew that as I intentionally sat down and started typing, God would come up with something. For some reason, He chooses this particular way to speak to me. I believe He specifically calls me to type it out through a blog post because someone else needs to hear the message too. Whomever you are, know that I am here. I am right here with you and am praying for you tonight. If you would like some specific prayers, please – and I mean please – do not hesitate to contact me. I am right here with you child / sister / brother / friend.
