Imagine…

Imagine being in a classroom where the teacher was speaking in a language you didn’t understand, with friends translating to you in your second language meanwhile trying to hold onto your first language in a classroom that the majority of people present are not fluent. Are you lost yet? Ha!

Imagine being in a classroom where not only does all of this occur, but there are also at least 3 other languages being heard through conversations around you, which you also do not understand.

Imagine being in a classroom and asking questions to find the answers that will allow you to move onto the next step of your work and yet still not fully understanding the response you are given even after asking your question multiple times.

Imagine repeating the same class year after year only to never grasp even the majority of what is going on, meanwhile the majority of people around you have a similar background in what is being taught. Now imagine the classroom is also at a constant 30 degrees Celsius and you are almost shoulder to shoulder with everyone else in the same class. Oh and you have a spotlight shining on you at all times. ALL times.

Can you imagine that? Do you feel lost during certain moments throughout the class? Overwhelmed even? Do you feel tired yet? Tired of trying to understand things that you may never fully understand and tired of feeling different or held back as the majority of others you are with already have an understanding of what is being taught or going on?

How do you feel as you imagine yourself in that situation? Please feel free to stop reading right here to tell me how you feel in the comments. I am curious.

The last little while I have felt tired – exhausted even – without even really understanding why. I was getting frustrated and honestly, pretty cranky. I was constantly searching for a reason of why I was so tired and saying it must just be this life of motherhood and heat and work and yada-yada-yada. Then there was a moment of intense breakthrough. I have been tired for so long and have never really understood why until Jesus explained this analogy to me – “Sara, imagine being in a classroom where multiple languages are spoken and…” well, you know the rest.

He was reminding me that it is normal to be tired while still feeling blessed to be here and feeling as if I should be doing more. He made me see life as a classroom where we are constantly being told and taught different things, our textbooks can be different and where there are different subjects and different aspects of every one. The only thing that is different as a missionary or someone living abroad is that we may have changed classrooms a few times (maybe even in the middle of a semester where you have already learnt so much, to only find out you have moved into another subject with another textbook, possibly never even finishing your last one) and more often than not, you have been immersed into different languages, different views/beliefs in the middle of it all. Now the main one in the classroom that is not being understood is you.

But you know what is exciting in it all? Although I may never be seen as an African, I have grown to have amazing African relatives who try so hard to help me understand this life and have helped me grow closer to Jesus as I look and see Him in them. I have met many people, experienced many cultures, the beauties and the hardships of each one.

The Lord is gracious in giving us this life on earth, where we have the opportunity to learn so much from one another and can lean on Him in the midst of completely feeling lost in it all, allowing us to search only for Him to find restoration and strength.

May we continue on in His Word as our ultimate textbook and His voice as our ultimate teacher.

Blessings friends!